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i love paul walker THIS much... [entries|friends|calendar]
mrs. na-na walker

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"pimp my ride... now, let's say it backwards, just for kicks. ride... my... oh! nevermind." [27 Apr 2004|10:12am]
[ mood | happy ]

hey, guess what? TODAY'S MY BIRTHDAY! i'm not kidding. i'm pretty excited. i got a buttload of presents... so that's cool. i seriously had the best weekend EVER! i had my birthday party on saturday, which was SO much fun, and after my birthday, all of my friends came and visited me at the art walk, and after the art walk, we went shopping, and out to dinner. then, after dinner, we split up with ashleigh, tegan, and n*len (they came, too) and went to the mall. it was just me, morgan, lisa, and kara. i seriously had the best time ever! i already said that, but that's alright, because i MEAN it! so, on sunday, morgan, me, chelsea, and ashleigh went to the oaks mall in thousand oaks, and went shopping for their prom dresses, and shoes, and purses, and accesories... stuff like that. it was kind of boh-ring, but guess what i got? i got a build-a-bear! it is seriously SO cute. i got to stuff it, sew it, dress it, bathe it... i got this totally cute ballerina outfit. she's SO cute... i named her anabelle. isn't that the cutest name? she's my baby. chelsea bought her panties. i wanted her to be a whore, but her godmothers (morgan, chelsea, and ashleigh) wouldn't allow that. they're such good godmothers. ashleigh, morgan, and chelsea got prom dresses, and i got a daughter. well, not really... so, today's tuesday, and it's my birthday! i'm SO happy. i've gotten SO many presents, it's strange. i feel SO loved. today, i got the "barbie" pink poodle from laura, and then i got another "barbie" dog that can walk and do tricks, from her sister. wait... i think i got that backwards. i'm not into barbie, but they're dogs, so that's alright. i got a few other things from her, but i can't remember what they are. i got balloons and roses from lindsay, and tori got me rose, which was strange, because i thought she was going to hate me after what i wrote about her... but i'm glad she doesn't. i still have to open all of my family presents when i come home today, so that's great. i have a huge family, so that means a lot of present. man, i sound selfish... but who doesn't love presents?

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hey, hey, hey! [16 Apr 2004|01:14pm]
[ mood | excited ]

yeah, just kidding! i've thought about it, and i've thought about it, and i've thought about it, and i've decided that i'm going to write in my journal again! ashleigh said that she was getting pretty bored since i stopped writing, so i thought "what the heck? i'll start writing again!"... so, i'm excited. well, today i'm going to the movies with ashleigh, and i'm probably doing something with taylor this weekend. he's the greatest. i love him to pieces. i have to baby-sit tonight, tomorrow morning, and sunday afternoon... so i'm trying to fit things in between everything. i'm helping ashleigh and jaimee (i can never spell her name right) shop for their prom dresses tomorrow, too... that should be a lot of fun. i'm running around like a chicken with my head cut off, because i'm trying to organize everything for my birthday party, but it's getting pretty confusing. a bunch of people are coming, so i'm going shopping with my mom next week, to get the food, and everything. i already have MOST of my decorations, so all i really have to do is put everything together. i'm SO excited. so, yeah. that's basically all i have to do for my birthday. everyone i wanted to come can come, too. how exciting is that? i think it's a little TOO exciting. man, lunch was SO much fun, today! we had the whole "prom expo" thing, so i got my hair done! no one was in line, so i just went up to her, and asked her if she was doing hair, and she was all, "sure! do you want me to do yours?", and of course i said, "no."... no, i'm just kidding. she was SO sweet, too. she was like, "i love your hair. it's so pretty!", and i seriously hate my hair, so we were joking about trading hair... i think you had to be there. then, we were making fun of all of the skanks who go to my school, and she said some of the funniest stuff! i'm seriously going to her to get my hair dyed from her now on. she's going to cut and dye it in a few weeks. i'm getting low-lights and high-lights. it's going to be expensive, but i don't mind. as long as my hair looks decent! she's worth it, too. she's so great.

1 comment|post comment

peace out! [17 Mar 2004|12:57pm]
[ mood | irritated ]

this is officially my last open-viewed journal entry. i'm sorry to say that i won't be writing in my journal EVER again... except in the "friends only" view. it's for your protection. no, i'm just kidding. it's basically for my protection. i don't want people writing anonymous comments in my journal, so that's why i've decided to change my journal to "friends only". i even have a cute little picture to go along with my "friends only" theme. isn't it cool? i think it's totally adorable. it has mo', ash-hole, lar-lu, and la-la on it! i love them, and i hate you. just kidding. i love SOME of you, but i hate some of you, too. it's a win or loose situation. for the people i hate... it's a "loose" situation. for the people i love... it's a "win" situation. anyway... that's basically all i have to say. i'm kind of torn between switching to the "friends only" view, because i want to be able to just pop online, pull up my journal, and then be done with it... but some people ruined that for me. some people ruined that for ashleigh, too... but i guess she's not going to give into them. she's willing to face the consequences. good for her! more power to "the cousin". you see, i'm a huge pussy, and i'm not willing to let people mess my journal up. i'm not into that hippie shit. the sex pistols aren't into it, either... except, they're not into sex. i guess they're cool with journals and anonymous comments... but i'm sure as heck not into it. so, yeah. i guess that's it. if you want to be added, then post a comment. ashleigh, lar-lu, erin, and la-la are already added... so don't worry about the whole "adding" thing guys, alright? i love you too much to diss you like that. well, i love some people... dude, haven't i already been over this? i think i have. man, i don't know what else to say. i feel like i shouldn't have to do this, but i am... do you see how some people ruin it for everyone? god... how inconsiderate. i hate people like that. i mean, i'm inconsiderate, too... but whatever. hey, do you know who is SO considerate? my lover, la-la. man, i went to her birthday party over the weekend, and she is SUCH a good host. i love her to death. we went tp'ing, and broke a peen-yata (remember... ashleigh, mo', and lar-lu?), and just had an all around good time. i love her. she's such a great person... unlike some people. amanda, we've already been over this, remember? oh, yeah... sorry, amanda. man, i always talk to myself, but it's kind of wierd typing to myself. i feel psychotic... like some people. so, yeah. i guess this is it. i'm sorry i was forced to do this. i would just like to thank the little people for supporting me... oh, god! i promised paul i wouldn't cry. i just... i'm so thankful to all of my fans. really quickly, i would like to thank my mom and dad for being there for me through thick and thin... i love you guys! i would also like to thank ashleigh for being such a ghettolicious cousin, i would like to thank lar-lu for being such a great lover (lar-lu, i totally forgive you for cheating on me with camilo), i would like to thank la-la for being such a great lover (la-la, i hope you forgive me for cheating on you with paul, and i totally forgive you for cheating on me with brandon), i would like to thank mo' for putting up with my silly shit, i would like to thank talesha for being such a good friend, i would like to thank erin for answering my questions about sex, i would like to thank my dog for being there when i needed her, and... STOP THE FUCKING MUSIC, BITCH! I'M NOT DONE! i would also like the thank the academy for nominating me, and then letting me win... all of those sexual favors i've given over the years have finally paid off! thank you!

2 comments|post comment

[17 Mar 2004|12:50pm]
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sorry... [15 Mar 2004|01:12pm]
i guess tori saw my livejournal, and read all of the stuff i wrote about her... so i decided that i should apologize, even if she doesn't want to accept it. tori, i only wrote those entries because i love you. no, i'm just kidding. that's not why i wrote them... honestly, i wrote them because you and kristen said that i was "fat", and that i needed to find something to hide my fat, even though it wouldn't work. now, i'm not exactly sure if you did write it, but i'm assuming you did. also, i got involved after you two got into a fight with ashleigh. i was trying to support ashleigh, but instead... i guess i hurt you. anyway, i'm not going to stop writing in this journal, but i like writing in the journal. anyway, i just wanted to apologize, and try to clear everything up. if you want to accept it, that's great... but if you don't, you're more than welcome to write anything you want about me in your journal. i don't have a problem with it... seriously, i don't. also, i'm totally sincere with this apology, so hopefully... you can accept it. i know i said a lot of bad stuff, but all i can do is apologize.
4 comments|post comment

i don't know... [12 Mar 2004|12:05pm]
i don't know, i don't know, i don't know. i'm getting confused... and i'm starting to hate all of my friends. that's all i need to say... well, for now at least.
1 comment|post comment

i've decided on a name for my journal! [11 Mar 2004|02:52pm]
[ mood | "grood" ]

how does reagan sound? i like it. i think i want to name one of my daughters "reagan". that's all i have to say for now, though... so, word to ashleigh (my incest partner).

2 comments|post comment

retards! [10 Mar 2004|12:18pm]
[ mood | accomplished ]

so, i'm basically bored out of my mind right now... anyway, to try and NOT be bored, i thought that i'd look at ashleigh's old journal, and to my surprise (not really), tori and kristen wrote another anonymous comment about how ashleigh thinks the world is revolved around her. god, this is seriously getting SO old. ash-hole... you need to close the account, but whatever. so, the comment was supposed to be in the format of a song, but it seriously didn't make any sense. well, being the totally, totally, totally nice cousin i am... i fired back with a song of my own. i think it's pretty cool. it's to the tune of "ring around the rose", or whatever the dumb song's called... so you'll have to figure it out yourself.


who's retarded? who's retarded?

signs point to you! signs point to you!

shouldn't you be busy? shouldn't you be busy?

i guess not. i guess not.

are you stupid? are you stupid?

probably. probably.

you are so pathetic! you are so pathetic!

drop dead, bitch. drop dead, bitch.


isn't that the coolest song EVER? i should be a songwriter... well, maybe not. i'm supposed to follow my dreams, right? well, sorry to break it to you... but that isn't one of my dreams. i think having sex with paul walker is top priority at the moment.

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yo, yo, yo! [09 Mar 2004|07:35pm]
well, i already updated today, but seeing as how i didn't really write anything about what happened last weekend, or yesterday, or today... i thought i'd give you "the 411". that is seriously the stupidest saying ever... but since i'm saying it, i'm not going to go any further on the topic of "the 411". so, on friday, i babysat my children (jack, john, and jill) at the park along with emily and anna. they're good kids... sometimes. that was seriously all i did on friday, except i went to school, came home and did homework, and then it was time to go. seriously. alright, so saturday was a bit different. i don't exactly remember what i did in the morning, but i babysat joey, alyssa, and pierce (that's joey's friend) across the street for a little while... for like, a few hours. it wasn't anything big. anyway, we watched like, a million movies, and they were pretty good. alyssa watched "sponge bob" while i watched "analyze this" with joey and pierce. michelle (she's alyssa and joey's mom, and she’s basically like my sister who acts like my mom) is alright with joey hearing a ga-jill-ion cuss words, and "analyze this" had plenty of them... i'll tell you what. so, that was saturday. okay, sunday was weird. i was home alone for like, five hours, while my mom, dad, and brother went fishing. i seriously think i'm adopted, because the only time i like to camp is when i actually think it's fun, and i get to choose what we do. fishing really ain't my style. anyway, at one o'clock, we had to go to newberry park to watch my cousin who's like, two days older than me, get some stupid "eagle scout" award, and my entire family was making a huge deal about it... but, whatever. i usually get left out on my dad's side of the family, because they're a bunch of rich people, and all of the cousins play sports, and are in relationships, and are gorgeous... you know, except for me. i love them, though... but it's only because i have to. so, yeah. i was also supposed to get a laptop from my uncle dan, but since it was so hot out, the fan broke, and he's going to fix it, and then ship it to me in about a week... which is cool. i don't mind. have you ever noticed that i use commas WAY too much? whatever. it doesn't bug me. anyway, my uncle dan is pretty darn cool. he lives in this HUGE mansion in poway, and i just made a tradition of visiting them every summer last summer, so i have to continue the tradition by going this summer... did that make sense? hopefully. their backyard was in "sunset" magazine twice. i'm not kidding, either. they have the coolest pool i've ever seen. i seriously can't wait to go back this summer. my g-to-tha-randma ride "first class" on the train, and then they come pick us up, and then we hang out and do whatever we want for like, a week. i get to eat poptarts by the handfull! it's so cool. i think i'll ask my uncle if my cousin ashleigh can go, since she's taking me on a trip to canada and washington d.c. this summer. i don't know... we'll see. my grandma's like, filthy rich, too... so she pays for whatever i want. seriously. last time she was all, "let's go to the mall, and you can get whatever you want!", which was kind of disappointing, because since i'm so fat, i don't like any of the clothes i see... but everything will be different soon, right ashleigh? right. okay, so monday was cool. it was lindsay's birthday (hoo-ray), and i brought her flowers and one balloon that cost me $4.99, which was a total rip-off. i hate it when i get ripped off... but she enjoyed them, so that was cool. she took her driver's license test after school... but she didn't pass it, which is totally okay. it's not a big deal, la-la... you'll get over it in time. so, tomorrow i'm babysitting for abby, zach, and ben for a few hours, which is fine with me. they're good kids. cute, too. oh, and this saturday is lindsay's party. i'm kind of looking forward to it, but then again, i'm not. i have a whole bunch of pictures to take this weekend, but i doubt i'll be able to do it, now... but that's alright, because i'm doing it for la-la. she deserves a good birthday, and if she wants me to be there, i'll be there. laura's going, too. laura's been making me mad lately... but i'm not going to get into that right now, because i'm in a pretty good mood. i talked to desta today, which was cool. it was maya's first birthday on sunday, so i went to the mall with... OH! that's the other thing i did on saturday! i went shopping with laura and ashleigh! that was seriously a ton of fun. laura picked me up in her mom's white mini van, and then we drove over to ashleigh's house to pick her up. we were listening to britney spears the ENTIRE time, too. you have to love britney. i know i do! anyway, we went to "fresh choice" for lunch, and then we went to the mall to go shopping for baby stuff for maya. i got her two CUTE outfits from macy's, and i got her that donkey from "winnie the pooh", except it's a stuff animal, with a rattle inside, and i got her these cute hair clips from "gymboree". i think i spoiled her, but whatever. hey, i'm going to be her first babysitter! can you believe that? they were all, "amanda, we want you to be maya's first babysitter!"... isn't that cool? oh, you have to love that. well, you don't HAVE to love it... but i sure do! what was i talking about? oh, so i was talking to desta today about "american idol", and how our favorite one (katie) is back for the "wildcard" show tonight! i love jon, too... he's my pen salesman. anyway... i better go.
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hella "heh-ro"! [09 Mar 2004|02:00pm]
[ mood | hot ]

so, i hella promised that i would hella update, but then i decided that it would take too much of my hella time, so i was all, "what the hella heck?", and thought that i'd actually hella update. so, hella yeah. hella nice, hella nice. i thought that it would be fun to write "hella" like, ten million times... but it isn't. anyway, ashleigh left after break because she "wasn't feeling good", and "had a headache". bologna! yeah, i'm not feeling good, either. whatever. she always fakes being sick. i'm just kidding. well, hopefully i'm just kidding, because if she IS faking it... i'm going to get pretty hella mad. anyway, i have some good news, and some bad news. the good news is that tori didn't make leadership! isn't that great? i think i'd kill myself if she was accepted into leadership, because you know... you have to be a role model to be in leadership. in other words, you can't be a fat psychotic bitch... so basically, you can't be tori. the bad news is that i have to walk home today, and it's hella hot. i need the exercise, though, because i'm going to get a donut/doughnut (i've seen it spelled both ways) on my way home! yeah, i'm pretty excited about that. is that kind of nasty that i get excited about food? i think so. anyway... man, my boobs hurt. i know that's gross, but laura pinched them pretty hella hard.

2 comments|post comment

grace is hella whack-o! [09 Mar 2004|10:49am]
[ mood | bored ]

grace is really, really, really whack-o. no, seriously. she is. anyway, i'm just sitting in the pod, pretending to do my digital photography homework... but i'm not, because i'm dumb like that. grace is going on, and on, and on about her stupid prom dress, and how she's going to look so "hot" in it. obliviously she's not, because... you know. that's mean, but whatever. man, the "do, do, do, do" thing is getting really old. it takes too much air to say "whatever", and "do, do, do, do", so i've decided to stop... for now, at least. i don't really have anything else to say, so i GUESS i'll write later. like in, technology literacy class.

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i'm working, i'm working, i'm working, working, working! [03 Mar 2004|02:51pm]
so, i'm trying to do my homework right now, but it's kind of hard, because i don't have "the right binder", and i don't have my history book, either. i actually finished my "ruler of the middle east" resume, but i still have a baseball card, a chapter outline, and a map to finish... and it's all for the same class! how retarded is that? does she think i'm super woman? i know she does, since i'm so beautiful, thin, and smart. yeah, right... maybe in a thousand years. i've never really worked on homework this much before. oh, shoot! it's 12:47 in the "pm"... and i was supposed to meet morgan in the bathroom at 12:45 in the "pm"! dang. oh, well. she'll probably come in the pod sooner or later. whatever (do, do, do, do)! man, i didn't think ronald reagan was this boring... i hate history. it's not like i'm planning on educating anyone on policies in the near future... so why in the heck do i have to take the class, anyway? whatever... i'm not going to worry about it. i'm just going to get my homework done. man, some girl is seriously honking in the pod. by "honking", i don't mean throwing up... i mean like, she's trying too hard to laugh. it's kind of sad. oh, well. it's not my problem. that girl can honk all she wants. you know when you see someone at school, or on the television, and you're like, "oh, man! i feel sorry for her!"? it's like, they're doing something stupid, but they don't even know it, so you're basically embarrassed for them? god, i hate it when that happens. it seriously happens all the time, too. girls these days act like a bunch of whores, who have nothing better to do than to talk about how many people call them "sluts", and then they decide to dance when people play music at lunch. those poor skanks... poor, poor skanks. did that even make sense? probably not, but whatever (do, do, do, do).
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my claims... which i'm VERY proud of! [02 Mar 2004|02:09pm]
[ mood | happy ]

    charlize theron's christian dior gown - 2004 golden globes
    jessica simpson's chanel dress - 2004 golden globes
    kate hudson's gown from the 2003 academy awards
    jessica simpson's eyes
    'til death do us part: carmen and dave
    got hitched to kevin zegers
    jessica alba
    adopted kevin zegers and eliza dushku
    urban outfitters
    britney spears' fairy tattoo
    "ghettolicious" and "phatty dope"
    black eyed peas
    britney spears
    britney spears -- in the zone
    "this love" by maroon five
    maroon five
    texas chainsaw massacre (2003)
    cold stone
    car: h2 (hummer)
    color: black
    year: 2004
    paul walker's butt
    paul walker
    jessica simpson

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another update... sorry, i'm bored. [02 Mar 2004|01:35pm]
[ mood | grateful ]

so, today was been pretty cool... so far. i'm going over to ashleigh's after school (when am i NOT at her house?), and morgan was her same old self, which i'm totally stoked about. i love morgan, but she got me all hot and bothered that one day, which really ticked me off. "operation prom" is going good, except i'm getting really sick of turkey sandwiches. well, i could NEVER get sick of subway turkey subs, but the ones that i make taste gross and warm. ashleigh's are pretty good, though. i'm thinking i'll bring salads one of these days, and maybe some yogurt here and there. i'm hoping this diet will work, because i'm tired of being "chunky", as my mom calls it. man, that girl is in fat denial. i feel kind of bad for my mom, because she can talk forever about my brother, and can't really say a gosh darn thing about me... you know, since i'm fat, i ditch school, i'm "disobedient", i'm "lazy, i'm "annoying", and i don't get straight "a's", like my brother. my mom isn't mean like that, though. she loves me... she really loves me! she's a great mom. when i get rich, i'm going to buy whatever she wants. no, seriously. she deserves it. man, she's been putting up with my lame butt for a LONG time, so she definitely deserves it. i'll give my dad some stuff, too. he deserves "it", too. i think i'm officially... done.

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school is kind of cool, now... [02 Mar 2004|10:00am]
[ mood | indescribable ]

so, morgan came up to me this morning, and was all, "are you mad at me?"... god, i hate it when people do that! there's always like, a million people around, but i guess morgan figured that it was their business to hear what i had to say. so, i was all, "a little bit.", and she was like, "tell me what i did! why are you mad at me?", and then i was like, "i'm not going to tell you why i'm mad at you, because everyone's looking at me, and trying not to look like they're listening in on our conversation."... so, then we huddled up like two lesbian losers, and "talked it out". she admitted that she was being a bitch, so i'm hoping she'll just... well, act normal from now on. anyway, i talked to laura on the phone a few days ago, about why i'm mad at everyone, and everything... and now everyone's coming up to me and apologizing and asking why i'm mad at them... when i only told laura about this stuff. i don't get it. now SHE'S the one that's making me mad. i seriously can't win. everyone's psychotic.

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survey... [01 Mar 2004|04:52pm]
[ mood | cold ]

What time is it? it's 4:10 in the "pm", yo.

What's your full name? do you honestly think i'm going to display my FULL name to millions of people on a crazy little thing called "the internet"? i don't think so. my first name's amanda, though.

Do you have any nicknames? sistah, nanners, na-na, gunther, ghettolicious nanners, chachiwaca... the list goes on and on, child.

What are your parent's names? kamala and darryl.

How many candles appeared on your last birthday cake? 16.

When is your birthday? april 27, 1987.

Who was the last person you talked to on the phone? laura.

What do you do when you’re bored? watch a porn-o... just kidding.

Starbucks or Coffee Bean and Tea Leaf? coffee bean, por favor.

Describe your perfect guy. let's see... his name begins with a "p" and ends with a "aul walker".

Do you have any tattoos or piercing? Do you want any (more)? Where? at the moment, i don't have any... but once i turn 18, i'm getting britney spears' fairy tattoo on my lower back, i want a dragonfly on my pelvic bone, and... i know that i had one more, but i can't remember what is was. i also want my nose pierced. god, i'll probably end up looking like a cheap whore... but whatever.

Where do you see yourself in five years? 10 years? 20 years? 40 years? married to paul walker, rich and famous, a few kids here and there, and surrounded by jig-ah-los, stripp-ah men, and hot boys.

Britney or Christina? both. i like britney because she's a whore, and i like christina because she's a whore who has her cooch and nipples pierced.

What was the last thing you got in the mail? What was the last thing you sent in the mail? something dumb, i'm sure.

What was the last dream you had? i was babysitting, and when i came home, my parents wanted me to come and help them do yard work in the backyard. my dad handed me this little tiny shovel to plant some of the flowers we got, so i started digging. i had only scooped like, one thing of dirt when i found someone's finger. then, i found the whole hand, and eventually the whole damn body. then we found like, three more bodies... and they were all women. then we found out that the guy who lived in the house before us was a rapist. so, then we had naked limbs poppin' out of our yard recycle bin. it was nasty.

Do you have an pets? yes... i have a dog named lady.

What’s your favorite body part on a guy? his penis line, and his boobies.

If you had a million dollars, how would you spend it? i would get an "h2", i would go shopping for a huge house, i would buy everything in pier 1 and pottery barn teen for my huge house, i would buy a whole buttload of clothes, i would smack hilary duff and say, "who's rich now, bitch?", and i'd buy a whole bunch of dogs, and a homeless dog shelter. i do have a soft side, you know.

What was the last book you read? i don't care for books.

Do you have a motto? "boycott hilary duff!"

If your house was on fire, and you could only grab three things, what would they be? a fire engine.

What’s your favorite vacation spot? san diego, and mammoth.

Do you have a diary? What was the date on your last entry? i don't care to write with a pen.

Who’s your best friend? paul walker, you retard.

Describe your dream house, dream car, and dream job. my dream house would be HUGE, and would have like a million rooms, and it would be on a HUGE lot of land, and would have like, 10 other houses my property, and all of the rooms would be EXACTLY like the rooms you'd see in the pottery barn catalogs. EVERYTHING would be pottery barn...pottery barn kids, pottery barn teen, and so on. my dream car is a 2004 "h2", and my dream job would be... paul walker's wife.

How many kids do you want to have? What do you want to name them? oh, god.

Have you ever ran away? yeah, but i was a total dork and ran to my grandma's house.

Have you ever been hurt emotionally? sure.

Have you ever kept a secret from anyone? sure.

Did you ever have an imaginary friend? only if i was schizophrenic.

What’s your favorite piece of jewelry you own? my class ring, because it cost me an arm and a leg. well, it cost my parents an arm and a leg.

Have you ever had a crush on a teacher? no.

What did you see the last time you went to the movies? Who did you go with? i saw "euro-trip" with ashleigh, the day the movie came out, at like, 10:00 in the "pm".

What are you wearing? sweats, a shirt, and ugg boots.

What's your hair color? dirty blonde, but soon to be brown with highlights.

What are you eating and drinking? water.

Who are you talking to? What are you talking about? i just asked my mom if "highlights" was one word, or two.

Of your friends, who have you known the longest? ashleigh, because she's my cousin.

Who's your loudest friend? laura.

Who have you gone to for advice lately? i don't take advice... i give advice.

Who do you cry to? my dog. she's a great listener.

What's the worst feeling in the world? The best? the best feeling in the world is while i'm making whoopie with paul, and the worst feeling in the world is after i'd made whoopie to paul.

Who will respond to this the fastest? i don't know.

Who WON'T respond to this? i don't know.


Cried? nope.
Met someone new? nope.
Cleaned anything? yeah.
Done laundry? nope. i pass on laundry.
Driven a car? yes.
Gone out to eat? nope.
Talked on the phone? sure.


Yourself? sometimes... god, what is this, anyway? would you like a sample of my pee, too?
Your friends? sure... when they're not acting like bitches.
Santa? no.
The Tooth Fairy? maybe if i was like, four.
Angels? i don't know.
Ghosts? nope.
UFO's? nope.


Band? maroon 5.
CD? "in the zone" by britney spears.
Singer? britney spears.
Actor? my husband, paul walker.
Holiday? christmas.
Color? olive green.
Number? 171262353494301230-123817123123823.
Actress? i have quite a few of those... so, i'm not sure.
TV Show? "queer eye for the straight guy".
Quote? i don't know.
Movie? you have to love "daddy daycare". that's what it's all about. i like "big daddy", too. i'm into the whole "daddy" vibe right now.
Phrase? i don't know.
Word? "ghettolicious".
Food? pies from marie calanders. i don't really care if i spelled her name wrong.
Disney Princess? what kind of question is that?
Magazine? instyle and lucky.
Finger? i don't exactly have a favorite finger, but i use the middle one a lot.
Designer? betsey johnson.
Song? "i love the way you move" by big boi.
Soundtrack? "euro-trip", because of "scotty doesn't know".

What time is it, now? 4:46 in the "pm".

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irot and netsirk [01 Mar 2004|09:51am]
[ mood | sick ]

on a saturday afternoon, irot and netsirk decide to take a little trip to the mall, hoping that they'd pick up some cute boys.
"irot, aren't i SO hot?"
"of course you are, netsirk. isn't my belly button ring so cute? my mom got one, too."
"definitely. oh, look! boys!"
"we better pull our shirts up, netsirk!"
"oh, yeah! good call, irot! wait... what are we going to do with our rolls of fat?"
"netsirk! how dare you call me fat!"
"i'm sorry, irot. i should have known that you think you're the hottest girl on the planet."
"you're hot, too."
"i know."
as soon as they pull up their shirts, irot and netsirk start running towards the boys, except the boys don't look too happy about it. they actually look pretty scared.
irot: hey, boys. did you know god loves you?
netsirk: my friend irot was changed by the cracking of jesus' bones in his new movie, you know.
boy number one: that's morbid.
boy number two: god, put your shirt down! you have more rolls than a french bakery!
netsirk: oh, shoot!
boy number three: if you're barbie, then i'm a pig's nipple.
irot: I'M BARBIE!
boy number two: yeah, and if you're barbie, then i'm the queen of england... except i have a penis.
irot: i don't need you jerks. i have millions of guys waiting for me.
boy number four: that's bullshit. i go to your school, and none of the guys like you.
irot: yes, they do.
boy number five: no, he's right. they all think you're a fake bitch. actually, they think you're an annoying, fake, fat, gross bitch who thinks she's god's wife.
irot: hey, netsirk... i think they like us!
netsirk: maybe he'll ask me out!
boy number one: the fuck i'll ask you out! i'd rather suck my dad's dick than ask you out!
boy number two: i'd rather date a herpes infected blister, bitches.
boy number three: yeah, cancer is starting to look pretty hot, now that i looked at you.
netsirk: let's go, irot. we don't need them.
irot: i am barbie, though.
netsirk: of course, you are. hey, would talking trash AT CHURCH help you feel better?
irot: yes! i do love jesus, though.
netsirk: i do, too!
as irot and netsirk leave the mall, they see another boy.
netsirk: a boy!
irot: you can take this one, netsirk... because you're SO hot.
netsirk: i know. i better hurry up and get him before he runs away from me... like most boys do.
irot: they're playing 'hard to get', netsirk. don't worry about it. he likes you!
netsirk: hey, boy.
boy: hello.
netsirk: what's up, boy?
boy: nothing much.
netsirk: will you hang on a second?
boy: sure.
netsirk: i'm just going to turn around, and shout to my friend, okay?
boy: that's cool.
netsirk: WAIT, BOY! COME BACK!
irot: he's gone, netsirk. he's gone. i say we go to church and pray for him.
netsirk: good idea.
so, the girls are off the church. when they get there, they meet one of the youth pastors at the door.
irot: don't look at her, netsirk. we're too cool for a youth pastor.
youth pastor: hey, girls! how are you?
netsirk: we're staying cool... like we always do.
irot: yeah! i'm barbie... and i love pink.
youth pastor: alright...
netsirk: we're going to pray for the boy who ran away from me at the mall, so we'll talk to you later.
youth pastor: alright.
irot: i'll pray for you, too... because i'm a godly person.
youth pastor: i'm sure you are, irot.
irot: it's barbie, bitch! BARBIE!
netsirk: ready to pray, irot?
irot: pray? oh, yeah! pray.
youth pastor: wait... why don't you two come to the youth service in a few minutes?
irot: alright. sounds like fun.
netsirk: yeah, boys!
netsirk and irot start walking to the youth room, and the youth service begins.
youth pastor: hello, everyone!
all "youth": hello
irot: I'M BARBIE!
youth pastor: anyway... what we're going to do tonight is something very special. i'm going to hand out pieces of paper and pens, and you're all going to write about something or someone that you'd like to pray for. once you're finished writing, you can put your piece of paper into that basket over by irot.
"youth" #1: youth pastor?
youth pastor: yes?
"youth" #1: can you move the basket?
youth pastor: of course... but why?
"youth" #1: i'm a boy, and those bitches are boy crazy. look at them... they're already drooling!
youth pastor: you're right. i'll move it. is everyone ready?
all "youth: yes!
everyone begins writing, and eventually everyone's finished with their prayers.
youth pastor: okay, let's pull the first prayer out.
all "youth": what does it say?
youth pastor: it says, "i pray for my cousin, and her cocky boyfriend".
"youth" #2: is "cocky" a bad word?
youth pastor: no, it's not. let's move on, shall we? this next one says, "hlloo, mi nme iz berbie, ad im the sexyst tinagyr aleive. boyz flck 2 mi frnt dooor, ad mi hilbely pareints heve 2 sooot dem, bcuz im sew hott. i dnt taulk bd abt peepol, ethr."
"youth" #3: i didn't know we allowed illiterate liars into church!
youth pastor: darn it, irot! don't you get it? this is church, not school. everything you just said in this PRAYER is a lie. you're not barbie, and you're not the sexiest teenager in the world, either. the thing that really blows my mind is that you said that you don't talk trash about anyone, which is a total lie. that's all you do, irot. no one here even likes you... especially the boys.
irot: netsirk, let's pray for her.
netsirk: alright.
youth pastor: i'm a youth pastor, irot. i can pray for myself. now, i think it's time you two leave, and stop pretending to be cool.
irot: fine, i don't need you, anyway.
youth pastor: that's a bullet through my heart, you dumb, fat, psychotic bitch!
irot and netsirk leave the church, and start heading for irot's home. when they get to irot's house, they see a sign on the door that says, "no irots".
irot: who's irot, netsirk?
netsirk: that's you.
irot: i'm barbie, though.
netsirk: your real name is irot, remember?
irot: whatever. i don't need them. let's go to church and pray for them.
netsirk: we can't go back, irot. we were kicked out.
irot: so, i was kicked out of church, and kicked out of my own house.
netsirk: let's go to your school!
irot: yeah... boys!
netsirk: boys!
irot: BOYS!
netsirk: BOYS!
irot: boys... troys... toys... boys... roys... BOYS!
at that exact second, irot blows up.
netsirk: i have to copy her, since i don't have a brain for myself!
then, netsirk blows up, and the whole world rid of the psychotic bitch twins.

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man! [27 Feb 2004|12:55pm]
[ mood | enraged ]

god damn! i honestly don't think that i've ever been more pissed off before. see, i'm so pissed off that i can't even piece a sentence together correctly. i seriously don't want to sit where i usually sit at lunch, anymore. the only person who i really talk to at lunch is ashleigh. seriously. linday's being a bitch, laura has her own little group now, kara's always gone... the list goes on, and on. i'm sick of all the drama. i'm totally, totally, totally sick of it. that's all girls do these days... complain, bitch, and moan. i'm not claiming that i never bitch or complain, but at least i don't tell the whole world how... god, i can't even talk about it. i'm sick of it. everyone just needs to fuck off for a little while. i'm sick, i'm tired, i'm pissed off, and i want to go home. i don't care. i'm not even going to try to be nice to people anymore. it's getting me nowhere. i used to look forward to lunch, and dread going to my next period (after lunch), but now i can't wait to leave our little "lunch area". god, do girls actually NEED drama in their lives in order to survive? it's not that freaking hard to get along with everyone. you don't even have to like them... just smile. i talk trash about people i hate ALL the time, but i'm not going around sharing my business with everyone and their mothers. it's pretty pathetic if you think about it. man, it feels good to let it all out... and don't think that i'm freaking done, because i'm not even close to being done. i'm honestly thinking about ditching that whole group, and working on homework in the media center at break and lunch. no joke. i would rather be a loner than hang out with those drama addicted bitches. i'm sick of it. i'm getting excited just THINKING about monday afternoon, and working on homework in the media center. that's how upset i am. i think i've covered everything.

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look at laura! [25 Feb 2004|02:18pm]

here's laura/lar-lu/KUMquat... this was another photo shoot i did, except all of the photos turned out better with laura, because it wasn't raining, and i wasn't ticked off. she's my baby's mama, this one.

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hey, hey, hey! [25 Feb 2004|12:29pm]
[ mood | hungry ]

man, i still can't believe how annoying i sounded in my last entry. maybe i was channeling the biggest bitch in the whole wide world... through my body. oh, god! that would be sick. re-lay sick. so, anyway... i re-lay want to put some more pictures on my journal, but it's not working. i guess i'll have to wait. god, i hate waiting. i'm trying to build my website right now, too... but that isn't working either. i'm telling you... i have the worst karma ever! no joke. sometimes... i think i'm a big fat bitch, or the biggest bitch in the whole wide world, rather than tori. oh, would you look at that? my website IS working. ah-ight! nice! i don't think the pictures are going to upload, though... that sucks. i don't know. maybe it'll work. nope, it didn't work. i told you i have bad karma! fucking karma. oh, man! sorry about the language! i just feel kind of... nasty! wait... i know why the pictures aren't uploading! they're ".bmp", and not ".jpeg"! i am SO smart! let me see if that works... IT WORKED! i am bad to the bone, bitch. bad to the bone! see... i'm pretty nasty today!

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